My "I-hate-boys" attitude sort of bled into this past week too.
It was 'F'. No, he didn't do anything. And I was still, STILL thinking about him. About what? I don't know. Do I want him to contact me? No. But I still kept wondering what he was up to, if he was spending the night in, if he was working, if he was out, if he was lonely, if he was still mad, if he was thinking about me.
I guess it just goes to show that certain people can get under your skin simply with TIME. The longest we ever went without talking was a week. And of course this week, all sorts of things kept reminding me of him. Things popped up that I would've immediately texted him about a few weeks ago. I hate that he is actually sort of my "type" and then to top it all off, we actually have that spark of chemistry. The kind that draws people to each other from clear across the room (or bar in this case). That, I suppose, is mostly what is to blame for why I let our entire relationship continue to function in such a dysfunctional way.
Ultimately, I hope to find someone who brings out the best in me and vice versa. That was definitely not the case with 'F'. We brought out the worst in each other. The absolute worst. As much as he makes me crazy angry and as much as I continue to tell myself all the reasons that he is so wrong for me, it still makes me a little sad. Yet another failure, yet another disappointment, yet another guy who has let me down.
And here I am again, back at Square 1.